


A (Late) Dean & Castiel Christmas

by under_a_grey_cloud



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha/Omega, Language, Male Lactation, Mpreg, Other, male pregancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 10:23:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9067564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/under_a_grey_cloud/pseuds/under_a_grey_cloud
Summary: Castiel learns first-hand about the human experience of pregnancy.When happy, he smiles in omega paternal bliss.When neutral, he expounds upon every possibly aspect of pregnancy.When unhappy, he uses decidedly non-angelic language.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [destieljunkie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/destieljunkie/gifts).



> This little story is a gift to [destieljunkie](http://archiveofourown.org/users/destieljunkie), who graciously introduced me to the world of AO3. She still answers a question or two, and helps me through crises of faith in my writing. I think I might still be struggling to figure out how to post my first story if it weren't for her.

Cas tried to sit under the tree with Dean but his belly got in the way.

 

“Father must have delegated the details of pregnancy to Lucifer. Why else would He make it so difficult for pregnant women and male omegas to sit? Or maybe it’s Darwinian. Encouraging expecting parents to assume physical positions that are ergonomically best suited to growing a child.”

 

Dean’s alpha instincts had him up and pushing a very heavy recliner over to Cas in about ten seconds flat. He helped Cas settle into the chair and sat on the floor, leaning uncomfortably against the controls on the side of the recliner.

 

“Wait! You forgot the foot raiser!”

 

“I thought you liked to adjust the chair yourself.”

 

“I did when I could reach the controls.”

 

Dean carefully adjusted the chair until he found an ideally comfortable position for Cas, who sighed deeply as he sunk into brown leatherette oblivion.

 

“It’s quite confusing. When I was an angel, I never felt the temperature. Now that I’m carrying a child, I’m constantly overheated or freezing.”

 

Dean re-hung an ornament on the tree.

 

“Dean. Did I mention I’m freezing?”

 

Alpha instincts aside, Dean tried to stifle a sigh and covered his husband with a soft fuzzy pink and blue throw blanket, decorated with babies wearing pink and blue diapers.

 

“You know I almost puked when I opened this package from Donna. Now though I gotta say it's kinda cute on you.”

 

Cas sighed happily. “I assume she sent it because she knows that pregnancy creates a need to keep baby comfortable, and she wanted to encourage my nurturing instinct.”

 

Dean huffed. “You don’t need much help with that, dude. Think you’re doing pretty well on your own.” Dean resumed rearranging presents under the tree and adding last minute ornaments. His back hurt from having lugged the tree into his house by himself. Cas had informed him that he now had a taste of what Cas’s back always felt like these days. He was fortunate that Dean couldn’t stay annoyed at him for more than a moment at a time.

 

“You look so blissfully maternal, Cas. I mean, I’m real happy we’re having the baby too. It’s awesome. But you’re actually shining.”

 

“I know. It’s a side effect of the flood of estrogen needed to grow a child. My hair is so thick I can’t comb it, and I’ve noticed I tend to smile for no reason. It’s very confusing, but quite enjoyable. I suppose it’s meant to balance out the discomfort of carrying a child. Maybe Father didn’t leave us after all.”

 

Dean knelt beside Cas and put a hand on his belly. “It’s kicking!” he announced with his never-ending wonder about all things related to the baby.

 

“I’m aware.” Cas sounded less thrilled than Dean.

 

Castiel drifted off into a nap. He’d noticed that since he became pregnant, he needed to eat and sleep. He needed to eat and sleep a lot.

 

Dean suddenly woke Cas by shaking his shoulders. Shouting hadn’t worked.

 

“Why would you do that? I was dreaming of a little boy or girl who looked like you.”

 

“If it’s a dude, that would be awesome. A chick, not so much. Have you noticed that your pants, the recliner, and the floor are soaking wet?”

 

“My amniotic sac has broken? In my sleep? I was looking forward to that experience.”

 

“Sorry dude, but it’s definitely broken. ‘Bout time to take you to bed.” Dean helped Cas laboriously pull his body to an upright position. They headed toward the bedroom. Several weeks ago, Dean had insisted on preparing everything they might possibly need. A stack of towels, washed with fabric softener. A couple of huge pots for boiling water, although Dean had no idea what for; it was something men always did when their partner’s water broke. Sam had explained that boiling water kills bacteria and sterilizes the scissors used to cut the umbilical cord. The pots were also handy to set on top of a stack of towels to keep them warm for swaddling the infant. Sam had given Dean a very nasty face when he'd asked how he knew all that information.

 

Cas got comfy on the featherbed Dean had insisted on buying. When the contractions started, he leaned on Dean and walked around, which he insisted helped gravity to quicken the birth. Unlike many pregnant mothers, Cas did not scream or shout obscenities as the pain worsened. Instead he ground his teeth so hard he removed several layers of enamel.

 

When Cas was in danger of grinding through the enamel to the detine, he decided that adding extreme dental pain to the already extremely painful process of childbirth was not a good idea. He ordered Dean through still gritted teeth to start boiling the water. Then he realized his decision to try to stop grinding his teeth was unnecessary. He began to scream whether he liked it or not. Dean rushed back to the bedroom as Cas explained “It’s normal AHHHH! to scream in pain. I’m FIIIIIIIIINE! Go back to boiling wAHHHHHHter.”

 

This continued until Dean heard Cas start to scream actual words. He dutifully continued to boil pots of water until he heard Cas shout “F... Father! Why the Hell did He think making childbirth excruciatingly painful! was good idea? Goddam f****** snake and original *** THAT HURTS LIKE A M*****F***** sin!”

 

Dean was impressed that Cas even knew that word. He carried the pots of boiling water to the bedroom as fast as he could, cursing each time some spilled and burned his skin. Finally he’d put all the pots on the piles of towels. He paced nervously around the room doing absolutely nothing. He also said absolutely nothing after Cas answered his first suggestion.

 

~~~~~ sometime later ~~~~~

 

Castiel really did look like an angel as he held his little girl tight while she fed. Dean couldn’t keep his hands off her. He glanced up at the clock. “Hey! It’s like two in the morning. Today is Christmas! Dude, our baby was born on Christmas day! Awesome. She shares a birthday with Jesus Christ. Must be because you’re an actual angel.”

 

“No, it’s because we conceived our baby 40 weeks ago. Jesus wasn’t born on December 25th. I was there. He was born in the spring. You humans decided to change the date to correspond with Yule, which pagans already celebrated. As if that could cause people who’d worshipped pagan gods for as long as they could remember to change their minds about Christianity and—“

 

“Shut up, Cas.” Dean’s face almost hurt from smiling. “So what are we going to call her?”

 

“A Christmas miracle."


End file.
